Day 151.

There was nothing more she could do. He had already gone. He had already left her. Funny thing though, was she didn't care. She hadn't cared for a while.

*

I wanted to share with you a message I sent to someone today describing falling in love.

"When it all falls in to place and you just look at someone and it hurts but in an amazingly beautiful pain kind of way and it gives you butterflies and you have to catch your breath and you can't be distracted by anything else because in that moment in time they're all you think about, all you can see, they're everything you never thought you'd have, they're the epitome of perfection despite your resolute admission that perfection doesn't exist, they astonish you with how they amazing they do something that's so simple is so wonderful in your eyes and then you fall even harder."

That, to me, is love. It's a rush of thoughts and feelings that don't allow you to take a breath. It's the culmination of all your thoughts building up together to create this enormous power that even you don't know how to cope with.

It's the sunrise you sneak out to see. It's the smell of freshly cut grass. It's the sun kissing your skin. It's the flutter of a birds wings. It's the first cup of coffee in the morning. It's the last thing you think of each night. It's the shooting stars. It's the inspiration you find on the street. It's the only thing that can remove a person from any sense of reality or normality. It's blinding. It's intense. It's amazing.

There have been so many times where people have given me the pity face because I am single. You know the one. They tilt their head and make that 'aww' sound. It usually instigates the next sentence quite rapidly of 'you'll find someone amazing soon. I'm sure.' This is where I present my overly confident self and say something that is instantly written off as denial. Clearly I only say I'm happy being single because I have no one to call my fella. On the contrary, in actual fact, I was saying how great it was to be single even when I was in a relationship. Go figure.

Love is designed to surprise us. It comes from so many different sources and generally at the most inconvenient of times. It's confusing and difficult but I bloody loves it I do!

We all want it. We all crave it and quite frankly, we all need it.

For now, my love comes from other things that don't involve menfolk. Well, at least not the kind that need watering and feeding all the time. Until the day an appropriate figure from the manfolk community pops up I will be happy living off the love I have surrounding me now.

As Johnny Cash once sang:

"Love is a burning thing
And it makes a fiery ring."

What poor Johnny didn't realise, is that he could of had a perfectly acceptable ring if he'd used a little more lube.

Awkward.

Hannah xox